You broke my sister

when she told me I cried.

Her soul, once so beautiful

started to rot.

She shakes it off and she meets another boy like you

and he breaks her heart

and she dies a little inside

and behind her eyes

I see the same demons who are hiding behind mine.

My darling,

dearest sister

I’ll wrap my hands around you and never let go.

I’ll do everything to make you smile

please, never cry again.

a brief guide to feminism for the women who don’t think we need it

If you are a women, girl or identify as a woman and you think feminism is unnecessary or annoying this article is for you!

Let me quickly explain what feminism is about. Feminists are fighting for equal pay, the right to vote, for women to receive education, own land and have equal rights within marriage. They also protect women and girls from sexual harassment and sexual assault. Allow me now, to take a moment and debunk the most common misconception about feminism: FEMINISM DOESN’T EQUAL FEMALE SUPREMACY. We (yes I am a feminist, thank you very much) just want for women to have equal opportunities men have. No matter what men seem to think, gender equality doesn’t exist.

Now, back to you ladies. Allow me to take you on a tour through history to see how much basic freedoms you have today you owe to feminists. Also for the duration of this experiment I’m gonna be using a fictional white woman, because women of color are still heavily discriminated today and while some things improved it’s not perfect by far. So, let’s look how you would live your life in the past, shall we?


Nothing complicated about that, is it? Not exactly.

In all time periods If you were born to rich parents you had a better life and more opportunities even as a woman than If you were born to poor parents. That being sad up until around the start of the 20th century girls were expected to obey their father.

In ancient Rome unwanted children (mostly girls) were left on the street and then sold as slaves. As a female slave you would be forced to work as a prostitute or work in a rich house. Masters would frequently rape their slaves. Slaves couldn’t marry and any baby born to a slave automatically became a slave.


You were born and spent the first few years of your life learning how tot talk and walk, now it is time to go to school. Well not really.

In ancient Rome boys and girls were taught together, mostly languages and etiquette until their come of age (12 for girls and 14 for boys). After that girls were being taught by their mother about cleaning and managing a household.

In the middle ages pretty much the only place a girl could get an education was a convent. So, you could become a nun or never know how to read.

In 16th – 17th century you could study languages If you were from a rich family.

In 18th – 19th century there was a rise in all-girl boarding schools as well as the first school for nurses. Finally the 20th century opened universities to women. Just a friendly reminder that Vivian Malone Jones the first black woman to attend a university in America did so in 1963.


So far you’ve learnt and experienced pretty much nothing so, it is time to get married!

In ancient Rome girls were under their father’s control for their whole lives. When they got married the control now belonged to the husband as well as the father. They were expected to bear children to continue the line. You could divorce quite easily in Rome (at most times), so at least there’s that.

In the Middle ages royal and other power families used marriage to gain more power or property. The wives of course belong to their husband and had to make babies. To get a divorce was extremely hard for a woman. If a man wanted to divorce he had to prove his wife’s infidelity. If woman wanted to get a divorce she had to prove her husband’s adultery as well as state another major reason. Just FIY rape and brutality did not count as a major reason. Yeah…..

It is of course mandatory for a girl to be a virgin when getting married. In ancient Rome the legal age to marry was for a girl was 12. While the husband could be up to 40 years old. In middle ages girls were expected to get married around 18 – 25 years of age. This expectation was kept up until pretty recently.

And of course you needed you father’s approval to get married.

Marital rape hasn’t been paid attention until the late 20th century when most countries made it illegal. Some countries still don’t clasify it as a crime even today.


Now that you are married and maybe you are even lucky enough that your husband isn’t 20 years older creep it is time to get to work.

If you were born into, or married into a rich family you don’t work. You make babies and take care of the babies. If you reader are a young girl you probably think this is a little far-fetched. Just go ask your grandmother, she’ll tell you.

If you were born into a poor family and your husband is poor too, you would had to work. In the middle ages you could paint textiles, keep livestock or work as a household servant. If you did work somewhere other than your home you were expected to have a male supervision at all times. You also had to cook and clean, look after the children as well as make cheese! Yay!

In Victorian Britain working class women worked in factories, as servants or in workshops.While being paid less than the men, naturally Just watch Suffragette to know how hard it really was.



Nowadays you may find yourself in a middle of a political debate and you are free to express your thoughts on the whole process as well as vote. You couldn’t do that in the past. Not by a long shot. Men didn’t want women in politics and hell they still don’t. THat all changed with the suffragette movement in the late 19th and early 20th century. Through protests and marches they won the right to vote. Finally in 1918 Women were allowed to vote in Britain. As long as they were over 30, were white and owned land. Still. Just watch Suffragette.

  • That’s it.

What a life it has been. You learned to read and gave birth to multiple children and If you haven’t died from childbirth you cleaned and cooked and kept your mouth shut untill your ultimate death.

That brings me back to you dear reader. If you a woman, still don’t believe in feminism just remember that every right, every privilege you have has been made for you by centuries of brave women who paved the way for you. The fact that you can go to school, to work. There have been women who said ‘fuck it’ and went for it, even though they were constantly being brought down by men, who didn’t want them to succeed. Even the women who did the small things, like using contraceptive methods behind their husband’s back, because they didn’t want to have another kid. It’s the women who read books and talked about them in public. It is the women who didn’t get married. The women who wrote books and painted. It’s the girls who put on pants and vests and lipsticks. Women of the past. The extraordinary brave women who stood up to the system as well as the everyday women who rebelled against society in small ways. Those are the real heroes, without them we wouldn’t have anything. Remember them the next time you think feminism is unnecessary.

should i write a book or just take a nap?

Do you ever get sudden, strong, overwhelming feeling that you hate your life? Because that’s all I’ve been feeling lately. For those of you who don’t know I study nursing in college. Lately though I’ve been feeling very bad about it. I love helping people, but I’m feeling it’s a little too demanding for me mentally. I’ve been suffering from depression as well as anxiety for the past three years. Especially the hospital training is exhausting. What it is basically you work for free at a hospital and all the nurses treat you like shit while you have to do the stuff no one wants to do and some nurses don’t even let you sit down for eight hours. Fun! I still have a couple of days of my hospital training left before I oficially pass the first year. Somehow I don’t think I’ll make it, mostly because I have to complete seven days of hospital training, but I only have four days to do it. Yeah. I don’t know how it hapenned and I certanly don’t know what I’m gonna do If the school dismisess me because I haven’t completed my training.

All of this got me thinking. What will I do If (when) I get kicked out. I cannot enroll to another school. I’ve already droped out of university 2 years ago because of my mental health. I cannot afford to study anymore If this school doesn’t work out. I was thinking about what I’d like to do, but I couldn’t think of anything that would be good for my mental health. Except writing. I love to write. That made me ask myself a question. Why haven’t I done anything about it already? I always dreamed about writing a book, so why haven’t I? I think the biggest obsticle is the language. I really want to write the vook in English and while I consider myself to be fluent English speaker, my written English is not perfect. I think it’s close, but it is not really ready for a book yet. I could always write a book in Czech but for some reason I don’t want to. So I wanna write, but cannot. I came to the idea of writing a script. I think it would be perfect way to release my creativity withnout exposing my sometimes akward written English. Writing a scrip, of course means that no one will care about it. Big televisions or streaming companies are definitelly not intrested in an unknown girl from central Europe. Still I feel it would be a good place to start. Give me something to do after I flank out. I’m not pessimistic, but with my current mental state I don’t know how I’m managing not to have a panic attack every hour. I just don’t think I have the strength or interest for that matter, to fight to stay in school. With that very uplifting thought I say goodbye, I hope you have a better day than me.


I wanted to run away from your way of finding God

the man in the clouds never ment anything to me.

A skeleton is watching over me as I try to breathe and focus.

The promise of  your love makes me light-headed.

If I find your God

will I be saved?


how many MCU movies pass the Bechdel test

The Bechdel test  is a method for evaluating the portrayal of women in fiction. It was created by Alison Bechdel in 1985.

The test has only three requirements

  1. The movie has to have at least two women in it,
  2. who talk to each other,
  3. about something besides a man.

I am always curious to see If a movie passes this test, but I never really got deep research. I decided to first turn my investigation towards the MCU. The Marvel Cinematic universe has grown to be one of the highest grossing and most succesful film franchises of all time. It just seemed natural to start our ‘Is the movie sexist’ series.


The Incredible Hulk (2008) Untitled-12-512

Fail. There really isn’t any named female character besides Betty.

Iron Man (2008) Untitled-12-512

Fail. Pepper and the journalist had a conversation, but it was about Tony.

Iron Man 2 (2010)Tick_Mark_Dark-512

Pass. Natasha and Pepper talk briefly about business.

Thor (2011) Tick_Mark_Dark-512

Pass. Jane and Darcy talk about physics for a bit, but mostly they talk about Thor.

Captain America: The First Avenger (2011) Untitled-12-512

Fail. There is only one named female character Peggy Carter.

The Avengers (2012) Untitled-12-512

There are three named female characters (though Maria Hill is only known as Agent Hill). They never talk to each other though.

Iron Man 3 (2013) Tick_Mark_Dark-512

Pass. Pepper and Maya briefly talk about her work.

Thor: The Dark World (2013) Tick_Mark_Dark-512

Pass. In this film there are four named female characters: Jane, Darcy, Frida, Sif.  Jane and Darcy and Jane and Frigga talk about science together.

Captain America: Winter Soldier (2014) Tick_Mark_Dark-512

Pass. Hill and Natasha talk about the bullet that killed Fury.

Guardians of the Galaxy (2014) Tick_Mark_Dark-512

Pass. Nebula and Gamora talk at the beginning about who should bring the orb to the blue guy. (???)

Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015) Tick_Mark_Dark-512

Dubious Pass. Natasha does have a conversation with Madame B at the red center in a flashback scene, but the madame was only named in the credits so it doesn’t count. Natasha does have a brief conversation with Laura about the sex of her baby. So technically it passes, only just.

Ant- Man (2015) Untitled-12-512

Fail. There are only two named female characters in the film and they don’t talk to each other. Scott’s ex-wife Maggie talks to her daughter for a bit, but I only count grown women for this test.

Captain America: Civil War (2016) Untitled-12-512

Fail. Natasha and Wanda don’t talk to each other throughout the movie. There is also aunt May, but she only talks to Tony and Peter.

Doctor Strange (2016) Untitled-12-512

Fail. There are only two named female characters in this movie: Christine and the Antient One (yes, I count that as a name), but they don’t even meet in the movie.

Guardians of the Galaxy (2017) Tick_Mark_Dark-512

Pass. Gamora and The Sovereign talk for a bit.

Spider- Man: Homecoming (2017) Untitled-12-512

Fail. There are three named female characters in the movie: aunt May, MJ and Liz, but they don’t talk to each other.

Thor: Ragnarok (2017) Untitled-12-512

Fail. There are two-three named female characters in the movie: Hela and Valkyrie, but, you guessed it, they don’t talk to each other.

Black Panther (2018) Tick_Mark_Dark-512

Pass. There are several named female characters and they do talk to each other, although it is mostly about T’challa.

Avengers: Infinity War (2018) Untitled-12-512

Fail. There are several named female character in this movie, and surprisingly they don¨t talk to each other.

Ant- Man and the Wasp (2018)Tick_Mark_Dark-512

Pass. I don¨t want to give out any spoilers about the movie, since I haven’t even seen it yet, but apparently Hope and her mother talk a bit about science.


Out of 20 movies 10 of them pass the Bechdel test. The Bechdel test only requirs a bare minimum. Just named female characters talking about something other than a man. That’s it. And still ten of these movies don’t even have that. Some of them like both Guardians or Age of Ultron barely even pass. In those movies that pass the women have usually only single brief conversation together. Or If they do talk about each other it is mostly about the men. I’m not saying, that the movies who fail this test are sexist, nor am I saying the movies that pass it are feminist. Captain America: The First Avenger has a marvellous (haha) female character in Peggy Carter and still it doesn’t pass. In Ragnarok there are two badass ladies, but the movie doesn’t pass. What I’m trying to say is The Bechdel test is not enough to determine if the movie is sexist, but it is the minimum. Women deserve to see movies with female characters in them. In this day and age, how are there still movies which do not pass these minimal requests? I say fuck you Hollywood, give women more space in your films! it’s really not that much to ask.